List of Grievances Due to Lack of Jayce
So, Jayce has been gone for three months with a week long break between the 1st and 2nd months, for medical school audition rotations. He did four week long rotations at the three military residency programs for Emergency Medicine. First he was in Las Vegas, then San Antonio, then Dayton, Ohio.
We purposefully tried to keep it off of social media while he was gone for safety reasons, but now he's home and I can record some of it on the blog.
I'll start with the tough stuff. Here's my long list of grievances.
#1- Hats off to all the single working moms out there who are actively trying to raise a family while carrying the physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental wellness of your kid(s) (and yourself I might add) on your shoulders alone. The strength needed for that is exhausting to even imagine. God bless you.
#2- This is a grievance and a mega blessing wrapped up in one explanation. I was sick for a good chunk of two of Jayce's rotations because of where I was in my pregnancy. It hadn't started yet when he left, so I was trying to fit as much in before it hit because I knew it was coming. Quality time with the kids, I was staying on top of cleaning, I made freezer meals in the hopes that I would want to eat them when I was sick (of course, I didn't), fun outings, etc. I'm glad we got that in because when it hit we were in survival mode and I spent a lot of time trying to regulate the boys from the couch.
I owe a lot to a few great friends in the area that did what they could to help with the bump in the road. One day the only thing that I could think about that might make me feel better for a bit was chicken noodle soup, so I texted a few girls in the neighborhood to see if they had some available. Robyn brought soup and crackers over that afternoon and stepped in to give them to me when I opened the door.
She asked if I was sick and how I was hanging in there and I crumbled into tears. She immediately went into super woman mode and told the kids, "Okay boys, I need you to go get your shoes on so that you can come home with me and play at my house for a while!" We have been friends since we both moved into the neighborhood, but she's also the new relief society president so it's not like her plate is empty. Plus, I came to learn that she was also pregnant and only a few weeks ahead of me and just barely coming out of her own sick phase, yet she pulled me through that day and more to come. The strength of women.
Annie's mom, Elna, happened to be visiting Annie around that time and the two of them teamed up to help out too. Annie gave me some vitamins and medicines to try that she had used in pregnancy. Elna made meals big enough to share and Annie would meet me at the fence to pass it over to me for quite a few of my meals.
One particularly bad morning in which I spent my time laying on the bathroom floor, they came over to check on me before going to run errands and ended up staying for an hour and half. They put lunch on the table for the boys, Elna tidied up the kitchen and living room, and cleaned the boy's bathroom while Annie helped me make a list of things I could get from the grocery store that would make for quick and easy snacks and meals to feed the boys. The boys ate a lot of Mac & Cheese during that time. Ew. I'm surprised they aren't orange.
Needless to say, that was a really rough patch for me, but I owe a lot to helpful family and friends who knew what was going on and could lend a helping hand.
#3- Having Jayce gone really effected my sleep. He just makes me feel safe, so having him gone was hard. I woke up 1-3 times a night most nights and normally it took a loooong time for me to fall back asleep. For those of you who know me, you know I love sleep and that I sleep like a rock...and sometimes snore. So, this was really weird and annoying for me. The worst night was when I started reading Elizabeth Smart's book. Loved the book, but not wise to read the first few chapters alone at home right before bed.
#4- My patience had a very short fuse, especially in the last month and I escalated into yelling at the boys and handing out random punishments often. Ugh, I hate that. I became a tantruming parent. Cameron started fiercely ordering Jack and Ben around and yelling at them for doing random things. I knew he was getting it from me and I knew I had to find a way to reign it in. How do I tell him that's not how we treat our brothers if that's exactly how I'm treating them? It reminded me of a story I read in a parenting book when someone saw a scene between a mother and her two children play out. One boy had hit another and the mom quickly spanked him and angrily said, "I'll teach you to hit!" as she tightly gripped his arm and dragged him away. Well, yes mom you will. It's never good when rage is what's leading the parenting, at least with my kids, and I had a lot of not-so-proud mommy days when it did.
Ah. Blog therapy.
We purposefully tried to keep it off of social media while he was gone for safety reasons, but now he's home and I can record some of it on the blog.
I'll start with the tough stuff. Here's my long list of grievances.
#1- Hats off to all the single working moms out there who are actively trying to raise a family while carrying the physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental wellness of your kid(s) (and yourself I might add) on your shoulders alone. The strength needed for that is exhausting to even imagine. God bless you.
#2- This is a grievance and a mega blessing wrapped up in one explanation. I was sick for a good chunk of two of Jayce's rotations because of where I was in my pregnancy. It hadn't started yet when he left, so I was trying to fit as much in before it hit because I knew it was coming. Quality time with the kids, I was staying on top of cleaning, I made freezer meals in the hopes that I would want to eat them when I was sick (of course, I didn't), fun outings, etc. I'm glad we got that in because when it hit we were in survival mode and I spent a lot of time trying to regulate the boys from the couch.
I owe a lot to a few great friends in the area that did what they could to help with the bump in the road. One day the only thing that I could think about that might make me feel better for a bit was chicken noodle soup, so I texted a few girls in the neighborhood to see if they had some available. Robyn brought soup and crackers over that afternoon and stepped in to give them to me when I opened the door.
She asked if I was sick and how I was hanging in there and I crumbled into tears. She immediately went into super woman mode and told the kids, "Okay boys, I need you to go get your shoes on so that you can come home with me and play at my house for a while!" We have been friends since we both moved into the neighborhood, but she's also the new relief society president so it's not like her plate is empty. Plus, I came to learn that she was also pregnant and only a few weeks ahead of me and just barely coming out of her own sick phase, yet she pulled me through that day and more to come. The strength of women.
Annie's mom, Elna, happened to be visiting Annie around that time and the two of them teamed up to help out too. Annie gave me some vitamins and medicines to try that she had used in pregnancy. Elna made meals big enough to share and Annie would meet me at the fence to pass it over to me for quite a few of my meals.
One particularly bad morning in which I spent my time laying on the bathroom floor, they came over to check on me before going to run errands and ended up staying for an hour and half. They put lunch on the table for the boys, Elna tidied up the kitchen and living room, and cleaned the boy's bathroom while Annie helped me make a list of things I could get from the grocery store that would make for quick and easy snacks and meals to feed the boys. The boys ate a lot of Mac & Cheese during that time. Ew. I'm surprised they aren't orange.
Needless to say, that was a really rough patch for me, but I owe a lot to helpful family and friends who knew what was going on and could lend a helping hand.
#3- Having Jayce gone really effected my sleep. He just makes me feel safe, so having him gone was hard. I woke up 1-3 times a night most nights and normally it took a loooong time for me to fall back asleep. For those of you who know me, you know I love sleep and that I sleep like a rock...and sometimes snore. So, this was really weird and annoying for me. The worst night was when I started reading Elizabeth Smart's book. Loved the book, but not wise to read the first few chapters alone at home right before bed.
#4- My patience had a very short fuse, especially in the last month and I escalated into yelling at the boys and handing out random punishments often. Ugh, I hate that. I became a tantruming parent. Cameron started fiercely ordering Jack and Ben around and yelling at them for doing random things. I knew he was getting it from me and I knew I had to find a way to reign it in. How do I tell him that's not how we treat our brothers if that's exactly how I'm treating them? It reminded me of a story I read in a parenting book when someone saw a scene between a mother and her two children play out. One boy had hit another and the mom quickly spanked him and angrily said, "I'll teach you to hit!" as she tightly gripped his arm and dragged him away. Well, yes mom you will. It's never good when rage is what's leading the parenting, at least with my kids, and I had a lot of not-so-proud mommy days when it did.
Ah. Blog therapy.
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